International Day of Non-Violence in Schools, marked with talks and games

The International Day of Non-Violence in Schools falls on 30 January, a day that promotes education for harmony, tolerance, solidarity, respect for human rights, non-violence and peace.

The children at after school showed that they know how to behave and came to understand, through discussion and games, that a conflict is settled through non-violent communication.

We kept to the practical side, because at primary-school age nearly every conflict starts in the same place: the child feels wronged but has no words for it, so they push, shout or withdraw. What makes the difference is a simple exercise — saying what bothered you and what you would like instead: "I don't like it when you take my pencil without asking". It sounds artificial the first time, less so the second, and by the tenth it has become a reflex.

A game is the best setting for this, because it offers repetition without real stakes. In a game you can try out a phrasing, get it wrong and start again — none of which is possible in a real conflict, with feelings running high.

We also talked about the part played by those watching from the side. More often than not, what decides whether teasing stops or carries on is not the reaction of the child targeted but the reaction of the other children around.

Preventing violence has to be a priority. And although the day is marked on 30 January, its message only means anything if it shows every day of the year.